i need an A

i'm craving for an A. eh?. biasa nye craving makanan. ahhaaha. dah lama kot tak dpt A untuk core subject. A- lagi la. asyik2 lulus je. typical problem student sekarang. bukan awak tapi saya. eh bukan nyee aku tak bersyukur. kecewa dgn diri je. sbb tahu diri ni boleh jadi lagi ok daripada tu. eh bukan nk berlagak juga. its just i know myself better. i know my potential. i know i can do it.

short semester had begun. done with the first week! sem ni aku ambik 2 subjek. microprocessor & interfacing and engineering management 1. ingat nak keje part time tapi bila fikir balik mmg tak boleh. kalau ptg smpai mlm keje pastu pagi nye ada kelas. bila lagi nk study? i need to score this. nak naikkan balik cgpa. right now its just sad. T.T im not gonna say how much tapi teruk la. and im really scared. bila jadi camni baru nk sedar kan? biasa la manusia. im not perfect. aku lalai. i have no discipline. i need a change. its not too late!

another problem. salah ke kalau aim nak dpt A?kalau kita rajin study buat semua assignment org kata kita skema. then salah ke jadi skema? sejak bila doing good is bad? let people say what they want to say but dont let it get you. 

grades, get well soon. >_<

untuk budak2 engineering :-

i edit the top. it used to be a crown but i was bothered by it. :)

think healthy! think iPad mini!

i challenged myself. no. actually i was challenged by my big sis. this 30 day challenge. currently doing squat and i just add crunch also. personally if you want to exercise its much fun to do with somebody. if you're doing it alone chances of you're not doing it or to give up is really high. im not saying its u. its just me. i need someone to push me. i need support when i feel like i can't continue. i need someone to continuously to remind me that I CAN DO IT. those moments are crucial if you're thinking of loosing weight. like me.

doing this right now. today is day 6! 75!

my goal for this month is to loose....

A BIG 5 for this month!

i need to have a goal right? to increase my motivation that is. besides wanting to loose weight, i just want to be healthy again, to be able to run without getting tired too fast to be able to do sports that i used to love ( handball), i just want to be fit like i used to be.

besides being healthy and loosing weight i also want to get an iPad mini. eh. why suddenly iPad mini? cause this is the prize i will get! that's if im able to loose a lot. i mean a lot. >_< seriously?? what should i do? im gonna get it. im dead serious. see me later in a few months. its never easy to start but one step at a time. yesssss! you can do it!

think healthy!think iPad mini! :P

mine. soon.

HELP

suddenly i thought of this song. 'help' by the Beatles. its just perfect to what im feeling now. im not okay. really not okay.

"Help, I need somebody

Help, not just anybody

Help, you know, I need someone

Help "

who can i reach to? mama? no. she doesn't understand. during her time of growing up it was much harder because of war and lack of education and everything. it was hard to get a good education at that time and only the wealthy people could afford it. but they don't understand this kind of things the new generation face. its different. i just don't know how to explain.

i'm annoyed plus sad. it just been hard. i do not expect people to understand but at least try. sigh.

this feeling will just later on fade away..it just needed time. tonight i'm just blogging nothing useful. just feelings.

goodnight. :)

it hurt soooo bad

what should i do? i really don't know what to do now. i mean..should i cry? should i be happy? should i be grateful? yes. i am grateful. but somehow it hurt so bad. so this is how it felt? this is how it felt to fail. nak nangis pun ada. hurt so bad. :(

aku sedih ni. first time kot fail. tapi aku mcm dh boleh rasa akan fail 1 subjek ni even before exam or study week lagi. mmg rasa mcm tak belajar apa2 mmg patut la kna repeat. perkara dh lepas. aku masih bersyukur subjek2 yg lain ok. 1 ni je problem. its ok this chance i won't waste it. i won't tell mama. that's for sure. mati aku nanti.

so mcm mna kita nak react if we fail a subject or course? what should i feel? what should i do when i felt that  like my life is crumbling right in front of me. adooii. dramatic sungguh. its not the end of the world.

to me. paling penting skrg i need to be strong. to accept this and to understand why it happened and to improve. second never give up. its not the end. thank you Allah for that. i was given another chance. to repeat this and to get better. third, i should be patience and optimist. everything happens for a reason. maybe this is my wake up call. bersabar. banyak2 bersabar.

i know. believe me. i know. kata2 lagi senang diungkap than to actually do it.so mlm ni kita nangis, kita sedih, kita menjerit sekuat hati, kita luahkan segala kesedihan di hati. esok pagi kita senyum, kita bangkit and keep on living.

honestly, its going to take me a while...to heal.. hopefully i can be more motivated by next week.

jom layan lagu ft island before tidur. you are love.  goodnight!

pencinta buku

assalamualaikum and wassup?

so i started writing again. it just crossed my mind and i had to write it down. so here is another one that suddenly pops out of my mind.

aku dah lama tak baca buku. novel ke majalah ke surat khabar ke. semua dah lama tak bukak. walaupun dah ada kemajuan teknologi yg canggih, nak baca newspaper online pun boleh. hebat tak? tapi aku kalau online langsung tak bukak website mcm tu. bukak apa? bukak facebook, bukak twitter, bukak youtube. *sigh

ok. jadi aku dah list-kan buku buku yg aku nak baca time cuti ni. nak kata buku2 ilmiah tak la sgt. novel? tp kan kalau ada buku yg boleh buat kita fikir kira ilmiah jugak la. kita tak boleh nak kata buku mcm tu tak berfaedah. reading a book itself gives benefit cause reading its not something useless.

aku lagi suka baca buku bahasa inggeris. bukan sbb buku melayu tak setanding buku bahasa inggeris. buku melayu hebat jugak. sekarang ada bnyak buku melayu yg menarik. so why? for me english books they write the words formally. kalau buku melayu ada yg guna bahasa rojak, short form. plot dah menarik tapi bahasa je kureng. :) aku bukan la pengkritik novel tapi hanya pencinta buku. nak kata org aku pun sama. bahasa yg aku guna tak la seindah mana. masih boleh difahami. so relax bro. :)

to me its good to read books. pinjam dari library ke dari kawan ke atau beli pun bagus. its a good investment. reading. so pick up a book and start reading! ;) bye!

here is some of the book that i wished to read during this holiday. :)

something bout love

love can be...weird, complicated, motivating, exciting, hurting, memorable and so on. it can be both negative or positive. depends on the way people see it, feel it or experience it. i can't really say anything but i know one love that is good for us and its forever. God's love.

aku teringat, mama aku selalu pesan kalau nak cari jodoh tu cari yg :-

1. sayangkan kita lebih daripada kita sayang dia
2. boleh bimbing keluarga, boleh jadi imam laa
3. hormat ibu bapa dia (bila dia hormat parents dia sudah pasti dia akan hormat parents kita)

mama takde sebut pn pasal duit atau pangkat atau kedudukan keluarga sbb duit tu kita boleh cari. alam ciptaan Allah swt ni luas. selagi masih bernafas selagi tu rezeki kita masih ada. apa benda yg kita nak tu tak semestinya benda yg kita perlu. we need to prioritize. live in moderation. tak mati pun kalau camtu.

aku ni bukan la baik mana tp aku tahu la juga dunia ni sementara je yg kekal tu akhirat kelak. this is our only chance so don't waste it. lari dari topik plak. ahaha. :)

kalau aku plak kira mcm 'my ideal type' la :-

1. yg ada hala tuju ( apa yg dia nk capai, kira mcm ada cita2 la. bukan mcm robot yg ikut je apa org cakap, apa org fikir)
2. yg boleh di harap, responsible
3. penyayang (to animals and humans)
4. aku rasa point yg ni semua perempuan pasti nak. which is loyalty.

kalau nk tulis semua mmg panjang la kn list aku tu. ehehehe. tapi nobody is perfect but its not wrong to try to be better. mmg la kalau nk kata Allah swt yg jadi kita mcm ni. tapi Dia tak jadikan kita mcm ni supaya kita tak usaha utk jadi lagi baik.

kalau nak cakap pasal cinta2 ni mmg banyak la kn. this is just my thoughts. that's it i guess. bye!

terima la hati ni... comel tak? :) have a great monday!